Deaditerranean

The shirt does not show a dog. That is the first thing to notice, and the thing most people miss. The native garment preview shows two lines of white type on a dark ground: IN DOG BEERS above I’VE ONLY HAD ONE. No paw print, no leash, no cartoon beagle with a pint. Just letters,… Continue reading The Dog-Years Joke on a Dark Shirt: Reading ‘In Dog Beers I’ve Only Had One’

The first thing I notice is the word. It runs vertically down the wrapper, blue capitals on a pale ground: SALTED BUTTER. Not butter. Not unsalted butter. Salted. The distinction is the whole design. The shirt is a salted butter shirt built as a costume: a butter-stick wrapper graphic scaled to the body, the kind… Continue reading The Salted Butter Shirt Says Salted: Reading a Kitchen Object as a Costume

The hat sits at the top of the print like a small engraved seal: a pointed witch’s hat in cream, its brim curved, a square buckle set into the band. Below it, in serif capitals, the words YES I CAN DRIVE A STICK. A long broom runs down the right side of the composition, and… Continue reading The Broom Is the Joke: Reading ‘Yes I Can Drive A Stick’

The first thing I notice is the spoon. Not the pumpkin, though it sits there in the lettering like a full stop. Not the farmer in the straw hat, though his hat is the only curve in the composition that isn’t a gourd. The spoon is what the design hands you: a utensil held upright,… Continue reading The Spoon Is the Only Tool in the Picture: Reading the Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater Couples Costume

The ghost is wearing sunglasses. That is the first thing I notice, before the pun, before the foam. The sunglasses are small and dark and sit low on the bridge of a nose the ghost does not have. The ghost is holding two beer steins, one in each hand, and both are foaming. The foam… Continue reading The Ghost Is Holding Two Beers: Reading ‘I’m Just Here For The Boos’

The first thing I notice is the soil line. Four root vegetables—carrot, radish, beet, onion—sit in a row, each with a small face and each with its roots drawn down into the dirt. The words wrap around them: LET’S ROOT FOR EACH OTHER AND WATCH EACH OTHER GROW. It is a garden pun, and a… Continue reading The Smiling Roots Have a Second Meaning: Reading ‘Let’s Root for Each Other’

On 12 April 2021, the European Commission adopted an Implementing Regulation registering Χαλλούμι/Halloumi/Hellim as a Protected Designation of Origin. From 1 October 2021, only cheese made by cheesemakers on the island of Cyprus and conforming to the PDO product specification could be produced and marketed in the European Union under those names. The registration is… Continue reading Halloumi After the Green Line: How a Cheese Became Cyprus’s Most Unlikely Border Infrastructure

The wrapper is the whole joke. A butter stick, rendered as a costume graphic, with SALTED BUTTER running vertically in blue capitals down the side. Not a pat. Not a curl. The full rectangular block, the kind you peel open on a Tuesday night and forget to reseal. The shirt does not show a person… Continue reading The Salted Butter Shirt Says Salted: Reading a Kitchen Object as a Costume

The shirt does not show a dog. It does not show a beer. It shows two lines of white type on a dark ground: IN DOG BEERS above I’VE ONLY HAD ONE. That is the whole design, and that is the point. The joke lives in the missing word, not in an illustration, and the… Continue reading The Dog-Years Joke on a Dark Shirt: Reading ‘In Dog Beers I’ve Only Had One’

The hat is cream, engraved-style, pointed, with a curved brim and a square buckle. Above the words, it sits like a crest. The words are serif capitals: YES I CAN DRIVE A STICK. A long broom runs down the right side of the design, and a crescent moon, small stars, and flourishes surround the lettering.… Continue reading The Broom Is the Joke: Reading ‘Yes I Can Drive A Stick’